A job or two

I wrote I needed to work all summer. I don't have much money left and I started to get worried. I decided to hand out as many resumes as possible. I don't rely on good things to come my way, I do my best to make it happen. I handed out 12 resumes.

Now I've got two jobs, given that my trial tomorrow goes well. I've started work on the café across the road from my house and tomorrow I have a trial at a restaurant down at the waterfront. I might end up working 24/7, working in the café in the mornings and the restaurant in the evenings. Pretty full on, but I am ready for that. I think I need to feel useful again. So life, bring it on! I am ready!

My good friend A

I call her A, she calls me Ma, together we plan to save the world.

Op-shopping, time machines, Clumsy Chefs, dinners for homeless people, literary journalism in bite-sized pieces, books of inspiration for writers. Our list of ideas goes on and on. Whenever we sit down to talk, thoughts and ideas fly between us. There is no way of stopping it and the word 'no' has ceased to exist.

I am lucky to have a friend like A.

To travel is human, to journey is divine

You can travel to every corner of the world without ever having been on a journey. You can see all the world's wonders without ever learning anything about the world. And most importantly, you can be on the journey of a lifetime without ever leaving the town you grew up in. As I see it, travelling is an external physical thing, while journeying is internal, it's emotional. Naturally, I'm into journeys.

Sometimes travelling can force us to journey. We arrive at a new place and the place somehow forces us to look at ourselves differently. I travelled to the other side of the world and journeyed towards a person I never knew I could be. Sean commented on the surreality of him suddenly finding himself in Sydney with four Norwegians he had no idea existed two months ago. I knew very well what he was talking about. Life can take some very sudden and interesting turns sometimes. And when it does we can't help changing with it.

You don't have to go to the other side of the world to start the journey of your lifetime, you just have to accept that life sometimes has something to tell you.

When each day is the same as the next, it's because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises - Paulo Coelho

Beware the ordinary life

On the arm you wrap around me is written in ink: "Beware the ordinary life".

February last year I wrote a blog post called How routine kills the passion. I wrote about how scared I was that my life would turn into routine, that I would have a job that no longer inspired me and live with a partner who no longer surprised or challenged me. That I at some point will stop dreaming, stop journeying towards a better person. And that I will be totally comfortable with that. That is what scares me the most.

I did not know you back then. Maybe I passed you in the streets without knowing that you two years later would change my life. Who knows. It simply was not our time to meet.

We met on September 25. It was this year's first Grand Final Day and despite the lack of results, the people of Geelong were out partying. Luckily, so were you and I. I saw you in the crowd, you had a cool jacket on, Beatles St. Pepper kind of thing. So I turned to look again.

You showed me your tattoo and maybe I knew right there and then. Beware the ordinary life. Four words that managed to incorporate everything I for so long had tried to express.

Thanks to you I am now rereading my own essays and short stories and I'm rediscovering The Alchemist, 1984 and Extremely loud and incredibly close. Three books I gave to you because they changed my life and mean a lot to me. Three books you're reading with a passion I hope you'll keep forever. Through you I have rediscovered my passion for my work and frightened I look back at how close I was to embracing my biggest fear. I had forgotten why I became a writer in the first place and I allowed my creativity to be governed by others, by should do's and must do's. It is time to write for me again. I thank you for reminding me of that.

On the arm you wrap around me is written in ink: "Beware the ordinary life". The four words that made me fall.

So much to be grateful for

I like my blog. I like that I can type with my heart on my fingertips and have people understand and not judge me for it. I appreciate that. And I appreciate that I've found a man who understands how important this blog is to me. Thanks.

This morning I woke up to a bit of online activity. I think many people back in Norway had read my midnight rant and I got a couple of messages from people I have not spoken to for a while. And I got a simple yet powerful message from my sister. A simple heart under comments to my blog post. We've both been so busy this second half of 2010, we've barely spoken.  That's why it meant so much. Just a simple message reminding me she was still there. Thanks.

I wrote in my last post that I would like to drink inspirational coffee with Anna everyday this summer. Today I spent the day at Uni, preparing my resume, because I am starting to get very worried about the whole money situation. As I was about to leave, guess who I walked straight into? Well, Anna of course. We had coffee and she helped me with my resume. And tomorrow we'll have coffee again. I appreciate that I have someone like her in my life. In addition to her insight and ideas, I appreciate her non judgemental, positive approach to life and other people, I appreciate that I can tell her just about anything and she won't judge me. Thanks.

And I am grateful that I have been given amazing parents who are strong enough to support a daughter's decision to live on the other side of the earth. They are the least selfish people I know, and I hope that they someday will get the appreciation they deserve. I can only give them my thanks, and I hope they understand how much their support means to me. Thanks.

Late night insomnia and an urge to confess

It's 2am, I'm awake. I guess it is just one of those nights when you can't fall asleep. Although I did, I just happened to wake up again an hour later. These nights happen now and then, and I figured I might as well do something more useful than tossing and turning in bed, and I thought you deserved a few words. Although first I made a cup of warm milk with honey and cinnamon. Perfect remedy for just about anything. It's like mixing raspberry and white chocolate; you just can't go wrong with that.

So, what can I share with you on this late night in November? Well, I would first of all let you know that life is good. Yes, apart from insomnia, life is indeed good. I have finished my Masters of Communication, with the results I was aiming for. I have to share with you, I honestly did not think it would happen as I was slightly distracted at the end of semester. But slightly distracted is good, especially when distraction comes in the form of a tall, good looking guy. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Uni.

Uni is done, but not dusted. I am being encouraged by my teachers to continue studying. They want me to do a PhD. So do I, in fact. Not sure I'm ready for that sort of commitment yet though, and also I need to do an Honours degree first, as part of a thesis preparation for my PhD. I'm happy to do that, because as soon as I am enrolled in an Honours degree I am allowed to teach at Uni. Professor Mari? Professor Nilssen? Either way, I like the idea. I love it, in fact.

However, in front of me are five months of summer break.

Here's a list of what I would like to do: write a novel, write short stories, go to the gym everyday, cook some awesome food, produce some seriously innovative journalistic work, travel somewhere nice with Sean, read an embarrassingly huge amount of books and have inspirational coffees with Anna everyday.

And here's a list of what I need to do: get a job and earn a lot of money.

Unfortunately what I need to do will take most of my time, there won't be much left for my wish list. However, there will always be some light shining through here and there, like good writing, reading and conversations. It will always be part of my life, in bite-sized pieces, just the way I like it.

In fact, in less than two weeks me and Sean will be going to Sydney for a couple of days to meet up with Trond, Robert and Stine. A bit of Norway time. Looking forward to it.

Let's try again, maybe sleep will be ready for me now.

Revelations of an aspiring writer

I have realised many things over the last couple of months:

Most importantly, I've realised it is time to start writing my blog again, this time in all honesty.

Secondly, I've found out that being an emotional writer is a good thing. Like my good friend Anna said: 'We wear our hearts on our fingertips while typing'. I like that thought. A couple of weeks back I handed in a piece at Uni called 'What Truman Capote could not teach me about writing'. It was the most personal piece I had ever written. It was a piece I wanted to write, a piece I needed to write. I had no idea whether my teacher would like it or not, and for the first time I did not care. Two days ago I got it back with the best mark I had ever gotten on creative work. My teacher wrote it was 'an outstanding piece, it's quirky and original and warm and funny and mad'. She encouraged me to publish it. I was stoked, honest and vulnerable writing had a place in academia. Sincerity is not dead.

Which leads me to another recent revelation of mine: chivalry is not dead either. More about that later. Maybe.

I've realised life is too short to spend it writing about things I don't care about. Wear your heart on your fingertips or don't write at all.

And finally another thought (or rather opinion) I would like to share is that there is no such thing as a realistic take on life, we are either pessimists or optimists. I honestly believe that finding happiness is a matter of choosing the right truth. I don't believe in an objective truth, and many so-called realists and believers of one truth or no truth would claim I am delusional or naive. That's fine, but I'm not willing to spend my life in misery just because the world is a tough place to be in. I believe realism is the condition we're given, pessimism or optimism is our choice. A choice which in turn determines our happiness. But then again, all that is my truth.

I am thankful for the people who have recently come into my life to remind me of why I became a fiction writer in the first place.